Taking A Look Back

I have been keeping journals about my life experiences for several years.  I don't write in them daily, but I am pretty close to it.  The journals give me an opportunity to write about things that are going on in my life as well as give me a format to think over a subject.  In many ways, my journal is a repository of my spiritual, mental, and emotional growth.

Occasionally, I like to go back and look at some of my journal entries and reflect on those experiences that I have had in my life.I do this largely for two reasons, encouragement and growth. By going over these thoughts again it can be encouraging to see the changes that have taken place, and by taking some time to remind myself of where God is growing me, I can learn more about who I am and who I am becoming.

Recently I did this, and after reading some random journal entries I notice a pattern.  At times I operate out of fear.

What is fear?

In my own definition, fear is my assumption that "bad things" will happen from the unknown. It is being anxious about the possible negative consequences that could be lurking there.  It is not that I am wanting or necessarily expecting things to turn out badly, but at times when my mind lingers on "the unknown", it has at times in the past become frustrating. I may try and think of what the right thing to do would be in a particular situation, but because of my irrational fear, I would get stalled and end up not moving forward into action.

In some ways, fear is a reflection of my lack of faith.

What are some areas in which in the past that I have chosen to be afraid?

• The economy 
• The morality of our nation
• Personal finances
• Job security and growth
• Failing at seeing Accountable Living become what I would like it to be

There are others, but these are some real examples of some of my own past fears. What I realized as I looked these over, though, is that if I were to take all of these things and wrap them all up into one word, it comes out to this:
 
Me.

My fear.

My failure.

My money.

My, my, my...... and the list goes on.

Putting It Into Perspective

I have at times put a lot of stock in me rather than trusting in God's sovereignty.  By identifying this in myself I am hoping to continue pushing away from "me" and more into my relationship with the Lord.  

So to help me in my pursuit, I will be reflecting on some verses which I believe hold more truth than many of us realize.


Philippians 4:6 "Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God."

1 Peter 5:6-7 "Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you at the proper time, casting all of your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you."


How about you?  Have you been shaped at times by fears or anxieties?